Create Influence at work, How to gain influence,

As the business world continues to adapt to remote and now hybrid work arrangements, I’m noticing that more and more of my clients want to focus on their ability to influence and persuade in virtual settings. In most cases, they can no longer rely on water cooler chats or hallway conversations to build rapport, develop relationships, or obtain stakeholder alignment. Instead, they must adjust their methods and styles to do this in settings where people are not physically in the same space. Since this concern has amplified over the previous months, I thought it would be beneficial to highlight a few of the strategies I’ve shared with my clients to become more influential in virtual workspaces.

A) Project Confidence

According to research by Don Moore of Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, people prefer advice from a confident source, even to the point that they are willing to overlook a poor track record. We often assume that since someone is confident, then they must be right. Of course, this is not necessarily the case. However, if we focus on the fact that confidence is what humans prefer, according to science, then it’s in your favor to work on projecting this trait.

Confidence combined with experience, knowledge, and preparation is a winning combination in most workplaces, virtual or not. Nonetheless, I’ve worked with far too many people who have had all of the latter attributes but suffered from a lack of confidence. Unfortunately, this diminishes their ability to influence others and garner trust effectively. So, the next time you’re feeling a bit insecure, challenge yourself to project confidence. It is what others prefer, and it's what we instinctively gravitate toward as humans. How do you convey confidence in a virtual work setting?

Try these three quick tips:

Increase the volume of your voice when speaking.
Assume an erect posture, and lean inward when presenting to others on screen.
Avoid qualifying and minimizing words when speaking, such as, I think, perhaps, maybe, quite, just, etc. (Later, I will tell you when these words can be helpful.)

B) Convey Warmth

I’m well aware that conveying warmth remotely is a challenge. When you are able to convey warmth virtually, it can be a very effective and advantageous strategy in your ability to influence and persuade others in the workplace. In fact, did you know that warmth is considered to be more important than competence?! To further support my argument for warmth, it is one of the three key ingredients that make up charisma, according to Olivia Fox Cabane, in her book, The Charisma Myth. Leaders often forget, or even under-estimate, the importance of warmth and the critical role it plays in how they’re perceived. I understand that conveying warmth can be challenging to do over Zoom. To address that concern, here are 4 tips that will instantly elevate your warmth factor:

Turn your camera on and smile. A smiling face goes a long way, and it has the potential to build a connection instantly.
Use the person's name when speaking to them. According to Dale Carnegie, someone's name is the sweetest sound they can hear, and it instantly validates their existence, which means that they'll feel more positive toward you.
Avoid distractions by muting notifications during working meetings. When you multitask and respond to messages while trying to have a conversation with someone at work, it signals that they are not a priority, even though your intentions may be in the right place.
Be curious and ask deep questions. When you ask questions about someone else, it tells them that you’re interested in them. Try to ask a few questions without turning the conversation back to you or injecting something about yourself. This requires a delicate balance because you don’t want to come across as nosey, and you don’t want to pry too much into the person’s personal life, especially if the relationship is new.

C) Be Diplomatic

Some people have a tendency of being very direct in their business communication. While, generally speaking, most would consider this a positive thing, if we’re not careful, it can come across as abrasive and possibly even rude. The worst part is when the speaker is unaware or when they don’t know how to soften their delivery to sound more diplomatic. After facilitating thousands of client meetings during my days as a management consultant, I’ve mastered the skill of ‘diplomatic speak.’ This is an essential tool to have in one’s toolkit when trying to influence others and climb the corporate ladder.

A word of caution though – this is to be used wisely, as you don’t want to be accused of being too indirect or even passive. Like most things in business, the ability to read your audience and modulate your style based on the situation is paramount. The ability to do this is what makes some leaders stand out as exceptional communicators. Here are 3 quick tips to help you communicate more diplomatically. Doing so will help you be perceived as someone more trustworthy and likable.

Ask more questions vs. using telling statements. (For example, I was wondering if..., or What if we considered….)
Use qualifiers to soften the delivery, such as just, quite, a little, a bit. (For example, That’s not quite the answer I’m looking for vs. No, you’re incorrect.)
Use conditional words such as could, would, should, ought. (For example, Would you mind emailing Jane?, I think we ought to consider a different approach.)

Increasing your ability to influence and persuade in a 2D world is very possible. It simply takes practice. Try a few of the strategies shared above next time you want to persuade or influence someone in the workplace and let me know how it goes. If you need further support, don’t hesitate to reach out. Remember, imperfect action is always better than the most perfect intentions.

So, remember